Whether you’ve been married a year or a decade, you’ve probably discovered that sex can go stale, no matter how much you love your partner. Keeping sex hot in a monogamous relationship is a challenge—but can you think of a better one to tackle? As any sex therapist will tell you, there really are differences between men and women when it comes to sex. As long as a man is still in good health, he generally needs little priming to get ready for sex. While that doesn’t mean he won’t enjoy foreplay, just the thought of making love is enough to make him ready.

Women need more. They generally express the need to know that sex means more than just a physical release. Yes, physical release is good for women, but for women orgasm comes more easily and may even feel better if sex has some emotional meaning.

Sometimes men really don’t seem to understand how to make sex meaningful to their wife. Because a man sees the act of sex as an expression of love, he may not get what he needs to do to create trust and intimacy.

That is where the art of seduction comes in. To seduce someone means to entice them, to make the idea of sex very appealing. Seduction requires charm. You need to be clever, to make yourself not only attractive to your wife, but to attract her to you as well.

One way to seduce your wife is to let her know how much you love her. And I don’t just mean her chest or tush. I mean all of her. Tell her how much you love her face, her hands, the curve of her calf. Tell her you love her kindness and her laugh. Notice the things that made you first fall in love with her, and tell her that you still notice. (more…)